Clothes Crisis Deconstructed

There should be one class devoted to The Clothes Crisis in every Psych 101 class at every major university. They are real and every man I know has witnessed one and every woman I know has experienced one and more painfully women watch their daughters go through them. They come on without warning. You are following your normal getting ready routine. You shower, dry your hair, brush your teeth, put on your makeup and then head to the closet to decide what to wear.

The “what to wear” part starts out with the normal thought process. You ask yourself the following questions. Where am I going? Who will be there? What mood am I in? First, you shuffle through the hangers looking for the anchor pieces to your outfit. At this point the crisis hasn’t begun (and 9 times out of 10 it won’t). Things are fine. You are happy.

You know you want to wear those 5 inch heels you bought yesterday for sure! It’s taboo to let them sit for 24 hours without wearing them, so you pull out a pair of pants and a skirt that you think will do the trick. Problem is, the shoes have that little bit of red in them and your wardrobe is low in the red department. You’ll have to stick with neutrals for the rest of the outfit. You’re still safe though because the skirt and pants are black. You put the pants on and add a shirt you think might be successful to pull off the professional, but fun and approachable look you are going for. You don’t love it, but the shoes will throw it over the top. You slip into the shoes like a stylist and then the crisis starts. Phase one, the “Things Don’t Go As Planned Phase” of the Clothes Crisis. Your spirits drop because the pants were tailored to fit your 3 inch heels and, consequently are floods in your 5 inch heels. You still have time though so you go for the skirt.

You love that skirt your butt is fabulous in it and you got it for half price, but no one needs to know that. You shake into it, zip it up the back slip the shoes back on. It’s looking good. As you look down your calves look lickable. You turn to the mirror and the crisis escalates quickly. That shirt you had on looks horrible with the skirt and the shirt you normally wear with the skirt is green and if you wear it with the little bit of red in the shoes you will look like a cheesy Christmas mom from the eighties. Your getting frustrated and time is getting short.
You go to the dresser. There’s so many things there that you just haven’t seen today that will go. Still, you’re not feeling confident. You just keep repeating the mantra, “I am going to wear these shoes!” You know you can do this. A man comes in to your view now. It could be your husband, boyfriend or son it doesn’t matter. They ask a question that seems infuriating like, “Where are my glasses?” or worse, “You’re not ready yet?” You look at them with the look seen only on the killer in a crime show and they back out the door.

This is when the throwing starts. You just start throwing everything out of the drawers in an attempt to quickly see the contents and discard the “doesn’t match” items into a heap to clean up later. You run to the closet, grab another pair of pants that go with the original shirt and shoes, but that isn’t the look you’re going for. That outfit doesn’t say what you want it to say today. It did last week, but that was last week before the new shoes got there.

During what I like to call the “Frantic Phase” of the Clothes Crisis it appears you are having a tantrum. You’re not. You are just becoming aware of the fact that although you have 3 closets and 2 dressers full of clothes you need to go shopping because you don’t have anything to wear! Seriously, a woman of your magnitude should have something to wear with 5 inch grey and red plaid heels that Gwen Stefani wore at the Grammies and you are trying to wear to work, because you don’t want to wait to wear them out on Friday night! It’s ridiculous.

At this point a man enters again trying to gently remind you that it is getting late and you need to get going and that’s when the next phase hits, the “Emotional Phase” of the Clothes Crisis. You usually start by stating disgustingly what you realized during the “Frantic Phase” which was you are going shopping tomorrow and buying out the store because it is ridiculous that you have nothing to wear. Then in a panic the tears sometimes fall. If you’re lucky the man will comfort you. Tell you to take your time and go in late or agree you should go shopping. Sometimes, however, you cross the line in your apparent tantrum and he has no sympathy and tells you to get over it, put on the clothes you wore yesterday and hit the road.

The final stage is the most humiliating. It can come immediately or hours later, but it is always after you have left the room and returned to find a disaster. This is the “Regret Phase” of the Clothes Crisis. You walk back into the bedroom and laid out before you is the visual reminder of your prior pain. A floor full of clothes stomped on and thrown aimlessly, reminds you of your insecurity and fragile state that day. It brings back the memories of girlhood when what you wore was who you are. It is true that the clothes you choose send a message to the world about you. That’s a fact, but you have grown to know it doesn’t define you, or you thought you knew that. Why did you have to get so upset?

You fold the clothes and put them away with a little shame and hope no one enters the room while you’re doing it. It’s like having to clean up the mess you made in the kitchen when you were 10 after you swore up and down you already did it only to have your mom drag you down the stairs to look at the disaster.

Once the clothes are safely back in their homes you contemplate returning the shoes…
Instead you pick out an outfit in advance for tomorrow that you have tested and know will match them. We are all girls at heart after all. And if you’re anything like me and my girlfriends you love clothes and choose them to fit your ever changing moods or particular occasions.
The last lesson for the Psych 101 class is for the men. During a Clothes Crisis be patient, be scarce and remember when your girl comes out looking liquid hot or PTA pretty and you’re proud of her it sometimes takes a crisis to get there and crisis is draining. So love us in spite of ourselves.

Qigong

As I went through chemotherapy last year I had to do a lot of quiet inner soul searching and at the same time opened myself up to spirituality. I didn't have to look hard, as spiritual information seemed to fall in my lap as I needed it like a guardian angel. Books that resonated with me at that time would have made no sense to me at others, but they just seemed to appear or be recommended.

Before my diagnosis of breast cancer I was training off and on with a personal trainer at our gym. He was a gentle soul and so grounded and kind for a 23 year old! We became fast friends and he joined our group of friends. As my diagnosis came many people at my gym were supportive which was one of the great blessings of the cancer. To see people support you that only new you as an acquaintance.

David, however, was a huge blessing. He checked in with me on Gmail chat often and I found out he was a highly spiritual man with lots of wisdom beyond his years about how to be happy and live in the now. We talked about death and dying or just plain crying. He had been reading the many books that I was at the time and we talked back and forth about the meaning of life.

I asked him to write for the blog about a spiritual practice he teaches and that is what comes next!

Qigong
posted by David Beaudry

I have been fascinated by the Mind and Transformation of Consciousness since I was young. This lead me to a BA in Psychology. I came across Qigong (Supreme Science Qigong Foundation) a year and a half ago and it has changed my life. My energy and clarity of mind have increased tremendously and I now have tools to tap into that place of calm and peace within at any moment.
“Qi” means life-force energy and is within everything in existence. Everything is a form of energy, our mind, our body and our spirit.
“Gong” means cultivation or practice.
Essentially “Qigong” is “Energy Cultivation,” connecting the Body, Breath, Mind, and Spirit. Enhancing the quality of life through opening our energy channels and balancing our physical, emotional, mental and spiritual energies. We use deep breathing techniques combined with graceful movements and visualization. We begin class with meditation to clear and center the mind, we then do subtle movements and deep breathing to connect and cultivate our energy. We usually end with Taoist yoga stretches to get back in touch with our bodies after our practice is done.
There are many beginner classes open to the Public. I teach classes at:Mt. Diablo Integrated Wellness Center in Walnut Creek, CA every Tuesdays @ 7pm
You can visit www.qigong.com or www.qigonginstitue.org to find a teacher in your area and get more info.
Qigong has opened up a doorway to a new way of being in the world. A practice that allows one to feel the presence and connection to the Divine. Some call it God...you can call it whatever resonates with you. At the core of our Being lies a deep connection to all that exists. We are all entangled in this fabric of life. We begin to realize that our reality and life circumstances are directly connected to our thoughts and beliefs which then form our habits. Becoming an observer of my underlying thoughts, beliefs, and feelings has allowed me to let go of many old patterns of thought that were no longer serving my growth. As humans our Mind is in a state of constant seeking, sometimes referred as the Monkey Mind. For the Mind is a tool to be used, and too often we let our Mind run our lives unchecked.
When we learn to accept the Mind and realize that we can accept our thoughts and feelings for what they are without judgement we can live more fully in the Now. That space we call Now expands tremendously, as the Mind is no longer looking in the past or seeking future achievements.
The essence of Qigong is cultivating our life-force energy and a way of being in the world. A way of interacting deeply with ourselves and the world around us. With Love, Compassion and Kindness in our hearts naturally our minds become filled with Peace. Not forcing life to happen, rather allowing life to unfold it’s beauty before us. If you watch nature, water doesn’t try to flow, and grass doesn’t try to grow. It simply is. As we we heal ourselves, we heal the world.

Kids...How do you raise them???

That's the trillion dollar question isn't it! No one really gives you a handbook. You're left at the hospital door with a baby and a car seat! I remember when Max my first was born. I was young, 23, a kid myself. I thought why did I think I could do this. I spent the next eight months in a panic. I mean that. I had panic attacks, was nervous and freaking out. I was at a moment in time where I was evolving as a person to a new person... a mom, a responsible for other lives person. It was really, frankly too much for me to handle.

It's been 16 years since that and all those years I still think everyday what am I supposed to do with these developing humans!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Someone help me! Recently, however, I have noticed that one of my kids the oldest one is actually making it. He survived me and he is actually a great person. He is a teenager I like to be around and so do others. He's confident, he takes some risks, he likes his parents, he talks to us about everything and anything and he kisses me and asks how my day was everyday. Don't get me wrong his room is a mess, smells like some kind of metal and he swears alot and eats too much junk food, but that's minor. Right?

Since I started down the parent path early compared to my peers and I have a lot of friends 10 years younger than I, I have begun to have people ask me how did you get this great relationship with your kids. My first reaction was, "You think I did something right? I've been flying by the seat of my pants trying this and trying that?" A few thoughts later though I realized there are a few things that I think have actually been a pattern in my parenting. I wrote those in an email to a new friend who asked me how do you instill confidence in your kids? I looked at her at dinner with her baby and toddler and thought thank God I am through that stage it is all so big and overwhelming then. What can I tell her to boost her confidence in herself, to put this whole big parenting business into perspective, to break it down.

What follows is a cut and paste copy of the email I sent her. She generously emailed back and told me she had put the email in a box of important things to remember that she keeps with her. Maybe some morsel of this will make you feel that you are enough for your kids. Cause you are! If you think I left anything out blog us back!

Here's the gmail:

Okay so I know you're a new mom and you were trying to see if I held the truth to raising kids...I didn't want to go on and on at dinner and bore our childless friends, but I thought I'd send you a few thoughts today! Now these thoughts are not truths because there are no "for sures" in raising kids. Every kid is a human being and requires different parenting and you will soon see that. But there are a few things that seem to be working out for me.

1. Be around and available. That doesn't mean you are constantly playing with your kids and entertaining them and having a Beaver Clever moment every moment. It means you are home and around and aware and your kids know that you are available to help them, keep an eye on them, know their friends, know when they are up to something. It will drive you nuts, but always let friends be in your house making a mess and eating your food becasue then you know what type of friends your kids have and can offer advise if needed. Also the friends will start to feel responsible to you as they get older if they have a relationship with you and not want to dissapoint you. One time Max's friend stayed over night and snuck out to go see his girlfriend. His mom called me the next day to tell me. Next time I saw him he apologized I gave him a lecture about how if I can't trust him then I have to monitor him like a child or he can't stay over. I told him he put me in a bad situation because I want to be responsible for him and asked could I trust him. He told me yes and was sorry and we never had that problem again.

2. Listen and validate the feelings of your kids they are human beings. What they feel they feel even if we think it is dumb or not true it is their perception. If your daughter is insecure at some point (which she will be as a girl) don't say things like that's not true you're not fat. Say I'm sorry you feel that way. I've felt that way, but then I looked around me saw that compared to other people I wasnt' fat and remembered I love myself the way I am. If you want to eat better we can do that if you want to work out we can do that. But remember girls at your age often have a hyper aware sense of themselves and sometimes it isn't always true. All you can do is love yourself and make changes in a positive direction. In other words teach that we only control so much in life. Worry is useless, but action is in our control. Always love yourself as a person and your kids will pick that up.

3. Put your marriage first and your kids follow. Go out with your husband, make time for each other and make the kids fit in with that. They will choose partners that then care about them and realize it's important to value yourself.

4. Accept them as they are...sports or no sports, loud or quiet, sensitive or not. I have a nerdy son that I would never have thought I would have! He still needs to feel like a great worthy person and I can't be trying to change him or he'll feel like he's not right. Neither kid is into sports, or getting involved in school stuff...there is a pressure to make them do those things, but finally I decided that you have to want to do something to do it. My kids are into family and friends and I don't think there is anything wrong with that.

5. Make family a rock solid center of life...sounds like you do that. Eating with the grandparents, buying gifts for cousins, visiting aunts and uncles....treating friends like family....the more people that are concerned for your kids and creating a village to raise them the more secure they feel as over said as that is.

6. Talk talk talk to them about anything. Never make any subject embarrassing, tell them about sex before anyone else has the chance, I did it starting with animals or whenever questions came up. I just answered what I thought they could handle. When my older son learned that girls have periods in 6th grade before I had told him and told me it was gross I was pissed I didn't tell him first and had to back track and tell him that's how he got here, it's not gross it's natural and really actually amazing that it works and never to talk badly about it to girls.

7. When all that fails just let your kids know constatnly they are great, valued and loved. Look for moments to praise them and moments to tell them when they are being jerks and how to change that. I say I love you at least 5 times a day to each kid or you're so cute in blue or your awesome at math...As long as they have that even if they struggle with things in life they know they are worthy and will eventually come through. I have also told my kids when they are jerks and how they can be aware of that and change that behavior too!

8. Remember no matter what you do your kids will sometimes take the wrong path or struggle. Some more than others. That is not your fault. Remember that you had times where no matter what people said to you you thought you were the exception. Show through your own actions that the world is full of adventure and options and there's no need to rush and miss out on things, that you can choose to go off the beaten path and try something, that failures are opportunities and can be recovered, that planning is also important and there's a balance. they learn that stuff by you and your husband living that life. they see hard work and are hard workers. they see adventure and know that it is an opportunity if that will make them happy. They see how you handle hard times in life either with positive outlook and emotions or by letting it knock you down. Be the best person you can be and they will learn. The best person may not be the same as the soccer mom at school to you and you can't emulate anyone. I dont' think you will have that problem though you are sassy.

Well I think you really wanted to know what I thought....if not this was too much info. Take it for what it's worth. There's no action plan just some big ideas.

Post Secret Review

If you get a chance to see the Post Secret exhibit when it comes to a venue near you, you should definitely go! And if you go you should try to hear Frank Warren speak. What a great guy. So genuine.

I saw him last night with my friend Rochelle. We snagged the tickets off Craig's list at the last minute, as he was sold out! He talked a lot about how this project has effected his life and how he thinks it has effected others based on their emails and comments. You can sense just by being in the room with him that all the secrets he is bombarded with (1000 a week) have made him more intouch with himself, others and the world. It seems setting free a secret liberates your soul.

It allows you to:
Move on...
Confront an issue...
Become a new you...

He has a stamp that he uses when he signs your book and it says Free Your Secrets and Become Who You Are. I find for myself that the more honest I am the more me I am. The more real I have to live my life if I'm living it out in the open for all to see. Love me or leave me I am what I am. I am notorious for admitting when I am angry, jealous, envious....usually in the end as the words leave my body I am able to figure out what the root of the emotion is and work through it. Sometimes I work through it on my own and sometimes the person I'm talking to helps me.

The great thing about honesty is that you find that when you're honest, although it is embarrassing sometimes, you find out quickly that others are feeling or have felt as you do. They sometimes get honest with you at that point and become more real and alive too. It Sparks a change in the world to make things true and real and creates a never ending circle of human empathy.

But ....Honesty or a secret doesn't have to be shared with anyone, but you. Sometimes we tell ourselves the truth and are evolved instantly into a new person.

When you're bugged, agitated, angry, sad or experiencing some emotion that is eating at you...ask yourself what's my secret....what do I need to set free.

PS
As I finished this, and at the same time am listening to CNBC, I realize that a transparent govenment comes down to individuals being honest, getting real, not keeping a secret. If that were the case then Ponzi Schemes would not exsist. When that person who is telling themselves most likely, "That the money will come back, this is temporary, it will all work for eveyone just need to keep it on the down low for awhile.." finally gets honest they will admit to themselves they are taking a risk with other people's lives and trust and if that doesn't stop them nothing will. No big law can change a human soul. Honesty can though.

Pandora Radio

Just a quick post to tell you about a cool site my friend Ames turned me onto. It's Pandora Radio. I put the link under my websites on the right. You register for free put in the artists or title of a song and they create a radio station for you of like songs. You can put a thumbs up or thumbs down to each song played and it only improves the selections they pick for you. Your can create several stations in different genres. Check it out http://pandora.com/.

Music is so great to have in your life.

Boob Art

My friend Mary, who went through Chemo at the same time I did, sent me this great link. It is artful and for a good cause....boobs!


http://www.quilters ofsc.org/ artfullbras/ artfullbras. htm

Wish I could think of something like this to organize....I'm thinking and thinking...

Give Love

A friend sent this out on Facebook....I liked it....

Give love

Give love, and you give strength. Give love, and you give life meaning.
When you desire to truly make a difference, let your actions be guided by love. Remember that even when all else fails, love grows stronger.
When love surrenders, that is its greatest triumph. Could anything be more miraculous or powerful or enduring?
Give love, and align your world with the highest and best possibilities. Expect nothing of love and you will have everything.
Love can never be fully comprehended. And so, it is an endless source of delightful and joyous discovery.
Give love, again and again. For you can always know it even better and experience it even more.

Ralph Marston

My friend is living with me!

My friend is living with me and it's nice to have another girl around! I have been the only girl in a house with a husband, 2 sons and a male dog forever and although I like being the princess at times. no one can relate to a girl like another girl!

No words need to be exchanged between us to know that despite the fact that no tears have fallen yet they soon will. We know immediately when the outfit we have on is making our day better (or worse). We understand a "clothes crisis" when we are unable to find the right outfit to match our mood, have thrown every article of clothing on the floor, basically had a temper tantrum and are determined tomorrow to explore the mall from top to bottom for new shirts since the 20 we have are just not right! We seem to know when one of us needs a pep talk, is having woman guilt or insecurities. We can show open enthusiasm for the arrival of the most current fashion magazines without feeling we should be just as excited to read the papaer.

Unfortunately my friend was in need of a place to stay to get her through a tough time and will be leaving in a couple of weeks. I'm sorry she was in pain, but actually a little happy to have had her here. Some things are surprising little gifts and I think even she would agree we have had a great time "hanging out". I like taking care of people, so I enjoyed making my son's room into hers for the short stay, making her dinner after her long trek to and from the city for work, long talks about whatever ailed her (or me), but the best was having her here for me in my emotional moments that I sometimes sweep under the rug while I try to help with homework or do the laundry. Thanks Ames for coming and staying with me.

What's good about Breast Cancer?

Well at first glance there's nothing good about breast cancer, nothing. It turns your life upside down. You end up scarred and sacred. You temporarily lose your hair, your eyebrows, your eyelashes and in some cases your nails and your breasts. Not to mention in many cases you lose your estrogen and consequently your fertility.....BUT you do gain some things that are ultimately life altering in a positive way if you can stay present in your life and not let the breast cancer define you.

• You learn patience as you wait for: results, chemo to be done, your new breasts if you reconstruct, radiation to start and finish, surgery day to arrive.


• You learn to slow down and appreciate relaxation as chemo, surgery and radiation force you to allow your body to heal.


• You learn the importance of determination to get through the day, the hour, the minute.


• You learn people are good if you let them in on your struggle. They will support you, encourage you and point out your strengths and how much you mean to them. You learn you really do matter in this world through them.


• You learn your kids can be strong and get through tough things.


• You learn your husband has what it takes (or not) to get through life with you.


• You learn your body is an amazing thing. Treat it well. Exercise it just for the health of it not to look like Heidi Klum. Have pride in it just as it is it can survive tough stuff and is stronger than you think.


• You learn that some of the things you thought were so pressing and important are small.


• You get a clear perspective about what is important to you.


• You get a chance to know, as only those that have been through a trauma know, that you choose the course of your living days and they are precious and there is no time like the present to make them count. Do "it" whatever "it" is for you. If you can't do "it" now make a plan to do "it".

Ultimately you learn that happiness is right there for you if you choose it... so choose it!



I know. I'm 40 and my 39th year was spent battling BC. I am at a one year mark since diagnosis, double masectomy, rebuild, chemo and hysterectomy. I still struggle with what Breast Cancer has done to my life view and my body, but I'm still making it through the emotions and I don't let them define me. My mom has had BC multiple times in her life as well and has chosen happiness over anger and fear in the end.



Let's talk about Breast Cancer here. Comment to me what you are feeling or have felt. I am going to post a series of emails I sent out during my journey on a seperate blog. They were sent to family and friends and reconnected me to many people I had not seen in up to 12 years. They seem to have inspired those who read them and those people (who I refer to as My People) encouraged me to get them out to the world. So this is my attempt to share those emails and to connect with others touched by Breast Cancer. check out my breast cancer blog at www.breastissue.blogspot.com.

Post Secrets

If you haven't heard of Post Secret it is a really interesting community art project that has become a national event. People create postcards and reveal a secret anonymously and send it off. The postcards are collected and published on a website and compiled into books. It's very interesting to peak into the secrets people keep from the frivolous to the very serious and realize how secrets effect our lives. It's also evident that setting the secret free is very liberating, as so many have sent these cards off into the unknown.

It's another place that you can go to see the similarities there are amongst all people. It also strikes me every time I read these posts that we never know what pain is behind the nasty teller at the bank or the guy who cuts you off on the freeway. Compassion towards others who are showing their ugly side is hard to give, but these cards remind me that their anger may be pain in disguise. If you wait long enough and have compassion everyone shows you their good side.

Check out the link under websites!

Recession Be Damned

I am the eternal optimist and I do think we choose our attitude, but I'm also realistic that sometimes things get tough and out of our control. It's then that you need inspiration from other's to help you find the strength to be happy where you are, make the best of the bad and walk over life's hot coals without needing the ER!

There's no denying our economy has put a damper on everypone's financial and career future. Our parents are watching their hard earned money burn up and fly away in the stock market. Our peers jobs are smoldering out as layoffs continue. I myself was laid off in December! We tend to forget that there are those coming out of college with a bright shiny new degree ready to use their really expensive new knowledge to fulfill their dreams only to find they can't find a job to get started down the road to success in their chosen field.

I got a forward from my friend Ames today that found a college grad in just that predicament. He didn't burn up in the recession fire. He decided to make the most of it and set out to see the country while working lots of odd jobs. To be exact 50 jobs in 50 weeks in 50 states. He didn't see any job as beneath him, but rather as an experience, a chance, an opportunity. He literally is riding out the recession in his Jeep. Check out the full story here... http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/c/a/2009/02/07/BU1215MNT6.DTL. I also included his personal website to the right on this page so you can check out his progress on his website Living The Map.

Kids Volunteering

It seems more and more volunteering is being required of kids in schools or needed on a college application to show community involvement. Here's my problem with that...there are only so many hours in a day and kids seem to be getting more and more homework, throw in a sport or other group activity and a fundraiser and there's no time for dinner let alone volunteering. I'm also not sure volunteering just to record your hours for a college application is necessarily the spirit in which we want our kids volunteering. Required volunteering...those words don't seem to go together.

I admit that I have not done a good job of getting my older son to volunteer. I try to show through my actions the importance of caring and helping others in need or just to make their day. However, my example is set by helping with friends and family in need. I'm a believer in taking care of "My People". Those in the circus ring with me! As far as putting that on a college application...I don't think that will count. Max, my older son, is very caring for a 16 year old. He asks me how my day was everyday, helps carry in the groceries and waited on me when I needed him during chemotherapy shit days, but I don't think that will count as required volunteering.

I am, interested in finding something for my younger son as he is much more interested in the concept of volunteering outside our home for genuine reasons. As I was searching the Internet for ideas I happened to see an add on CNBC for City Year. Unfortunately, there isn't a location close enough to me to participate, but I thought the site was worth sharing as there are plenty of other locations .

City Year is an organization that brings kids together to better a community and help in schools. There are opportunities for elementary, middle and high school students. Kids commit to 10 months of volunteering on weekends and breaks, but what appears to be different to me with this organization is that as well as putting the kids to work there are meetings to help them understand the underlying social and economic hardships that they will be improving and how their volunteering individually and as a group can Spark a change!

Check it out if you have kids that may be interested! There's a link to the website on the right hand side of this page.

T

What's This Blog About?

Where to start???? 2008 was an interesting, tragic, transformative year for me. I was diagnosed with breast cancer in January 08 and my life just got more and more interesting from then on! With the help of family, friends and a set of journal emails that I consistently sent out I made it through the year in good spirits and became a more enlightened person. Sometimes going through hell and coming out the other side inspires you.

I was inspired by the people all around me during my year from hell to be a stronger, better and a more gracious person. I was touched by the generosity of spirit that flowed from people near and far. Some of those people I saw everyday, and some I hadn't seen or communicated with for 12 years! As these people surrounded me like a cloud and helped me float through the year of treatment (instead of free falling on my own) what I had always known was confirmed... I need people and people are good.

It's such a simple concept... people are good and they need each other. However, we lose sight of that!. As I wrote my journal emails simply titled Update. I got lots of encouragement to "do something" with them. They seemed to have inspired those reading them, as much as the people reading them inspired me to keep chugging along! It makes sense. Most life traumas we encounter have us run the same set of emotions. Although I was working my way through cancer, others were working their way through divorces, death, pregnancy, break ups, etc. We all need to know others understand us and relate.

So there it was the opportunity to create a place online to all come together and Spark each other to be stronger, better and more enlightened! Those Sparks are little moments of connection with others that lift our spirits, help us cope, teach us and help us understand life more clearly.

So let's Spark each other! Let's talk about the big and the small things that bring joy to life. From the smallest to the largest topics. Let's not be a doom and gloom blog let's talk about how to be happy from the inside out! This is the place to learn to make every moment important. Think of it as using fine china at the kids table...hell why not...what are we waiting to use the fine china for!

Let's go...let the Sparks fly!
T